How Can I Face My Kids After an Arrest?
Posted May 23rd, 2017 by bhuertas.
You had a few too many drinks after work one night. Instead of being smart and taking a cab or Uber home, you decide to drive. Bad idea — you see the police car lights in your rearview mirror. You soon find yourself in the back of that same police car. Now come the questions: How much is this arrest going to cost you? Will you lose your job? And how are you going to tell your children about your arrest?
It’s a hard situation for everyone involved, especially for the children. They have no idea what’s going on, what it all means, and how it can affect them. What should you and your family do?
Here are a few tips to keep in mind:
- Always tell them what happened. It can be extremely difficult to explain the situation. But the sudden disappearance of someone close can leave a child very confused and scared. He/she could become very angry or withdraw from others. This is why it’s best to sit down your child down and explain the situation.
- Be honest. Sure you can lie and say that your family member had just gone away on vacation. However, the chances of a child finding out the truth are pretty high. It’s best to hear it from someone they love and trust rather than a secondhand source.
- Make a plan. You should tell your child sooner rather than later about the arrest; however, you should definitely have a plan in place. Make sure you have all the information available in case he/she has questions.
- Keep it simple. Don’t go into too much detail and don’t accuse. Tell the child what had happened, how long your family member will be away, and that this does not change how your loved one feels about the child. Encourage the child to write letters and accept phone calls from your family member.
- Get help if needed. Even explaining what happened, your child may still be confused. It may be best to have your child speak with a professional about what is going on.
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